Mirror, Mirror
by Glittering Pegasus
Summary: A glimpse into a possible use for Sirius's two way mirror that didn't involve detention with James. RemusSirius preslash, MWPP


**Title:** Mirror, Mirror  
**Author:** Dani C.  
**Rating:** PG  
**Characters:** The Marauders; Cameo by Mr. and Mrs. Lupin  
**Summary: **What Sirius never mentioned about the mirror he gave to Harry.

**A/N:** I actually wrote this two summers ago and posted it on the remusxsirius livejournal community, but I just found it again and figured I might as well share it here too.

Remus lay silently in the hospital wing, staring up at the ceiling and trying to ignore the sting of a deep bite he'd inflicted upon himself hours before. Last night had been a particularly brutal transformation. Finally, in the last few hours before the relieving sunrise, the other Marauders had managed to calm Remus's beastly form out of its rampage.

Sometimes Remus was sure the wolf in him responded to his own feelings and pressures. The month of May in his fifth year was sunny and sweet, yet agonizingly stressful. With O.W.L.S. stiflingly close and professors inherently strict, it suddenly became clear to Remus that in missing so much class time, he could not succeed easily as he had his first four years at Hogwarts. Almost all of his free time was spent in the library studying on his own or with a willing tutor. The hours he usually spent sleeping were nearly cut in half to make time for writing essays and brewing potions.

He was a living, breathing zombie, completely lost in a world of assignments and test anxiety, and his transformations reflected it. Consequently, Remus in his natural, teenage form felt the effects twice as harshly.

"Moony?" the quiet greeting followed the set of footsteps.

"Morning," Remus turned over to see James, Sirius, and Peter standing over him as they always did.

"Feeling alright?"

Remus shrugged and managed to push himself into a sitting position, glad to be taking pressure off the scratch marks on his back. "Not horrible, all things considered."

Sirius tossed his hair in a manner unlike his usual cocky, unashamed one; this time, it was a nervous gesture. "Yes, about that… we're sorry, mate. We tried all night but… it hasn't been this bad since the first time we tried, Moony."

Remus nodded. "I know. It's okay, honestly. You helped more than you could ever realize."

The boys seemed contented with that response, but Sirius noticed something self-conscious and nearly concealed gloss over his friend's eyes. The group conversed languidly, simply wishing to brighten the face of its chalky, ailing friend. Finally, Remus announced that he was having trouble staying awake and wanted to try and rest. "Thank you, though. I'll probably be out later today, after I sleep a while."

The group slowly dismantled and James and Peter exited the hospital wing. Sirius moved to follow them, but lingered and turned back to Remus's bedside. "What is it, Moony?"

"What is what, Padfoot?"

"You… you're thinking about something and it's bothering you. I can practically see the wheels grinding a hole through your brain and-- don't give me the 'I'm tired,' excuse; it won't work with me."

Remus couldn't help his smile, as he'd been forming that exact excuse before Sirius's warning, "It's just… I don't know. It's silly."

"Try me," Sirius sat in the chair by the bed and folded his arms.

"Well… I was just thinking about last night, and how bad it was. I realized how… how spoiled I've been this year, since I've had you and James and Peter with me, how much easier it made things. And how I'd forgotten how bad transformations can really be. And… and that scares me."

Sirius nodded, understanding Remus's point. "You won't have us this summer…."

"Back in that basement, with my parents waiting anxiously upstairs, terrified that I might end up attacking myself to death… I don't know, Pads. I don't know if I'll be able to go back to that."

He looked so tired, so completely defeated; Sirius's heart broke for him. He reached out and took his friend's pasty left hand in his right, and placed his other hand on Remus's gaunt upper arm. Remus welcomed the comforting touch and came forward to lean his forehead on Sirius's shoulder.

"It'll be okay, Moony… you'll be alright… we'll think of something. It'll be okay…." Sirius promised, gripping the hand more tightly. "I'll think of something…."

It wasn't long before he kept his promise.

In June, the night the moon was to be full, Remus carefully lifted a square parcel from his drawer and unwrapped it. He brought it down into the gloom of his too-familiar cellar and hung it delicately from a nail in the wall; high enough to be safe from his leaping and clawing, but not too high as to become unseen or unheard. He smiled contently into it before tapping the surface with his wand.

"Padfoot?"

"I'm here, Moony."

"Good. Just testing it."

"You alright?"

"I'll be fine," Remus answered as he heard the door being locked at the top of the stairs, and his parents calling out that they loved him from behind it.

"Alright. Padfoot will be with you the whole time."

"I know."

The clouds were beginning to swirl into darkness, and the moon in all its full, glowing, spherical glory was mere inches from its throne amidst the stars. Remus felt the world begin to spin.

"Hey Moony?" he heard as he fell to the floor, hands and knees scraping roughly against the concrete.

"Y-Yes, Padfoot?"

"I… you know you're my best mate, right Moony?"

Remus couldn't answer now, but Sirius knew he had heard, and hoped that somehow, the wolf had comprehended. He shut his eyes and let himself transform, barking along with his friend's tormented howls and praying that, though thousands of miles away, the sounds would be enough.

At dawn, a faint pink splash of light sprinkled through the doorway as Mr. and Mrs. Lupin tiptoed down the stairs to carry their son up to bed. "Does he look more peaceful to you than usual?" his father whispered, the voice of a desperately hopeful parent.

"He does," his wife answered, and her voice quivered with tears because this time, it was true.

Neither of them noticed as a face in a mirror on the wall smiled faintly, tossed his disheveled black hair, and dissolved into reflection, leaving an ordinary mirror once again.


End file.
